We’ve all made New Year’s resolutions. Stop smoking. Lose weight. Spend less time at work and more with the family.
But what if ending your marriage is tops for 2013? What if getting a divorce is your New Year’s resolution?
If you’ve made this decision, you’re not alone. Family law attorneys are well aware that after the ball drops on New Year’s Eve and the champagne has ceased to flow, the number of divorce filings rise – even spike.
Scores of unhappy spouses resolved to seek a divorce some time during the outgoing year, but decided to hold out a little longer, to spend “one last holiday” together as a family before lowering the divorce boom. The announcement that they want to end the marriage is postponed to prevent putting a damper on the year-end festivities. They smile through clenched teeth and get on with it, especially if there are children.
Family counselors say that when children are involved, delaying the announcement may be the best choice for everyone, provided everyone can get along. As long as the estranged spouses are not fighting and friction between the couple isn’t too high, it’s best, the experts say, to allow the kids one more holiday with Mom and Dad under the same roof.
On the other hand, the holidays can reinforce a spouse’s desire to split, when animosity overtakes goodwill and their rift is amplified amidst otherwise festive times.
Accountants will advise you that filing after New Year’s Day may be a sound financial move, especially regarding future division of assets. One spouse may get a Christmas bonus, which is money that the other spouse would want added to the overall family ledger. Regarding taxes, the finances for the couple would be fixed for the entire preceding twelve months, helping make the division of assets easier to calculate once the divorce process truly begins.
As a spouse, you may have found yourself caught off-guard by the announcement. As hard as it is, it is best to do everything you can to control your emotions and keep your temper in check. Don’t blow up in a rage that could make you say or do things that you’ll later regret. The best advice from people who’ve been through it is to do your best to stay calm. You have to go into catch-up mode by making preparations of your own.
Divorce attorneys will advise you to start gathering any files or information that can give you an accurate picture of your family finances. You’ll need to supply yourself with the data you’ll need to put you on equal footing with your spouse. Your new year does not have to begin with a war; you just need to be prepared for the battle.
The reality is that many couples will begin 2013 in the same situation. It isn’t easy or pleasant coming to terms with the end of a marriage. The best thing to do is ensure you have strong legal support. If you are in need of a divorce lawyer, the resources on this website can be invaluable to you.
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