Stress the great sex killer in marriageWhether it's a traffic jam, marital problems, job loss or general anxiety, stress can take a deadly toll on your body. Although research indicates a small amount of stress may help your motivation and energy level, too much and you will be in the doctor's office. In fact, experts believe up to 70% of doctor visits and 80% of serious illnesses may be exacerbated or linked to stress. Researchers have also concluded that stress may hurt something else: your sex life.
Not being in the mood, however, may not only be in your mind. If you are highly stressed it may also take a physical toll. In a recent study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, researchers analyzed the sexual response of women divided into high stress and average stress groups. As the women were exposed to visual, sexual stimulation the researchers noted that those in the highest stress group with the highest levels of the stress hormone cortisol in their system were the least likely to become physically aroused.
Researchers discovered stress levels can affect readiness
Researchers discovered that when women feel they have a lot to do or have increased stress levels they are not "primed to operate at peak performance." Ironically, having sex is known to be a great stress reliever. Much like exercise, if you can get past the initial stress, having sex can be a natural stress reliever. Others ways to reduce stress include exercise. Exercise, including yoga, running, or weight lifting can all increase blood flow and eliminate stress.
Researchers also note that any type of skin-to-skin contact such as a back rub or a massage can also help. Even if it does not lead to physical intimacy it can reduce your stress level while increasing contact with your partner. Researchers also noted that once the stress levels are decreased, especially for women, they may be more in the mood to be intimate with their partners.
Finally, experts suggest putting sex on the calendar. You schedule exercise, meetings, play dates and a night out with the friends, why not schedule something else that is even more critical to a healthy relationship. Some people think the notion of scheduling sex is absurd, but the more jammed packed your calendar is the more important scheduling can become.
It's like anything else, for some of us, if you don't write it down it does not happen. Writing a sex date on the calendar allows you to prioritize it and gets your body and brain in sync with your schedule. For men and women, scheduling a date can build the anticipation and start the physiological response of arousal.
No sex is an indication of marital problems
Divorcing couples have generally stopped having sex months before they decided to file for divorce. While not having sex is merely a symptom of something bigger, maybe an emotional disconnect or infidelity, we all know it is critical to maintaining a healthy marital relationship. If stress is hurting you in the bedroom, it might eventually derail your marriage.